A scary start

Addressing negativity is not an easy way for me to start.

Since I skipped my introduction, here is a little about me. My name is Traci Woldengen.

I have been married for five years. My husband Dan is a manager at Costco and no, he does not get a discount. Everyone always asks that. We have a two year old daughter, Savannah. I am a stay at home mom.

I usually consider myself and fairly happy and positive person. But lately, I haven’t been. I have been overwhelmed by life because it hasn’t been going the way I want it to. Most days I feel horrible, frustrated, impatient, selfish. I feel like Eeyore, unable to get out from the rain cloud following me around. I feel like God has been trying to hand me an umbrella, but I am ignoring it. I know its wrong, but I just keep waiting for Dan to show up with one. He hasn’t. My response to the whole world right now is negative. Dan gets the brunt of it. I am frustrated with him and I make sure he knows it. I am frustrated with our daughter and I make sure he knows it. I am frustrated with life and I make sure he knows it. The other day he told me that he wished that I wasn’t so tired all the time. I have been trying to figure out what in the world to do with that comment. Other than call him a jerk, and yell, of course I’m tired! Today it hit me that my grumpy negative attitude is what I need to change. I seem so tired and worn out to him because I am gloomy and frustrated. So today I am going to try to not complain about Dan or to Dan. I am even going to give up my non-verbal sighing when I am annoyed. This really is not an easy place to start this challenge.