The Talleys

I'm already so excited as I read all of your stories. I feel that we are all getting ready to embark on a "treasure hunt" as we dig in to each other's lives and as we are challenged by all that God is doing in our hearts.

Here's me:

My husband and I will be married 2 years this coming January. I really can't believe its already been that much. We met in college, through Campus Crusade for Christ event and I was immediately attracted to him. (I knew I didn't have a chance--he was too perfect.) We became good friends for a while and he expressed his interest in me and wanted to pursue me. After us both taking some time to pray about it, we decided to step back and pray about if this was something God wanted. We became friends again, and I was crushed. This time apart gave me a chance to completely rely on God's sovereignty. Nine months later, when I "knew" he had moved on, our pastor embarrassingly hinted at the fact that we should talk about our shared interest in each other. So we did. A year and a half later we were married. We live in Liberty and I'm a teacher and he's in charge of the high school and middle school at Shoal Creek.

Our marriage has been a collision of two worlds coming together, trying to figure out what God has called us to be. My husband is very analytical, logical, strategic and uneasily rushed. I am very expressive, irrational, freedom filled and fast-paced. We knew we had a lot to learn from each other, but we had no idea the journey this would take us through. The biggest pain that has risen in our marriage has been my husbands intense desire to do what is "Right" and my extreme desire to just "Trust." Our battles are a tug of war between the two. He likes black and white, I like gray. This led to a big disappointment in me realizing he's not the perfect man that I want him to be and in him realizing he's not perfect.

We have begun to face the fact that neither of us know how to really "love" each other. I have seen what a selfish person I am and that I am always making life about me and what I want. This leaves him trying to fill a bottomless pit and me not being full. We have drilled into this well only to hit rock and nothing more. Though I am aware, and disgusted by my needyness, I seem to still operate this way. God has placed a mirror to my face so many times throughout our marriage and shown me my failure to make Him my God. This may always be my downfall, but I am thankful for the chance to try again and again.

I hope to have the chance to serve him and to rely on God to fill me as I accept the "dare" to try again.